POWERHOUSE

My neurologist told me that one of the best things I could do for my MS was to exercise daily. We all know that whether it’s MS or aging or depression ( insert excuse here)… we seem to look upon it as a chore. It’s a challenge to make ourselves get up, get out, get moving. Many with MS can’t stand or walk unaided. For those, exercise is a monumental challenge. I’m thankful that, as of this moment, I’m able.

There is something about this disease that lures you into wanting to rest, to resist movement. There is a tightening or spasming of the muscles that feels as if you are turning into stone on some days. The remedy is to move, in whatever capacity you can that day. I look at my ability to move as a blessing and a privilege bestowed upon me daily. Because I know that living with MS means this ability could be taken from me at any moment. It’s the nature of the beast.

So, I asked my doctor, what type of exercise is most beneficial besides aerobic?

She told me to do Pilates or yoga to strengthen my core and shore up my balance. So, I took this prescription and filled it. One of the daily reminders from my Pilates instructor is to “find my Powerhouse”. She means to tighten and strengthen those deep muscles that support your spine , those corset muscles that bind your core and give your body it’s “inner strength”. My Powerhouse!! For some reason, whenever I write this word, I feel the need to capitalize it, no matter where it is falls within the sentence. Just as we capitalize important places and landmarks and people’s names. This word commands our respect.

So this week, as I found my body in class and my mind trying to drift, I heard her reminding us all to find our Powerhouses and “engage”! Engage our muscles, our cores, our minds, our breathing. Not to drift through life, allowing the wind to take us wherever it feels. But to visualize and utilize our core muscles when we walk, we sit, we breath. To be active not passive in all that we do. I left class thinking about my Powerhouse and my ability to stay engaged, not just with my muscles but with my mind and spirit. And I left class thinking …hmm…Powerhouse. Where have I heard that before?

There are many different theories about what causes MS and one of them is that it may be a disorder in a tiny, but mighty component found within every cell in our bodies, our mitochondria. In my pre-med biochemistry class, years ago, I remember learning about mitochondria, a.k.a, the “Powerhouse of the cell”. These little bulldogs take nutrients from the cell, break it down and turn it into energy. They take glucose and oxygen and turn into ATP, which is fuel for our bodies. So if we run out of ATP, we run out of gas.

As anyone has learned from reading my blogs, I can’t help but to think in metaphors. So, I started thinking about how we all need to find our metaphorical Powerhouses.

What is my Powerhouse? What is your Powerhouse? It is so different yet so essential for all. It could be your faith, your family, your spouse, your companion, your pet. It could be your profession, your giving, your talent. It’s that essential component in your life that you feel you could not live without. It’s that internal flame that we forget to stoke. It’s that person or pet or inherent gift that we take for granted. It’s that ability we still have that we assume will always be there. It’s what makes us keep on ticking.

So, how do we feed our Powerhouses? What nutrients are we providing to keep them churning and burning ? It could be meditation, exercise, writing, prayer, creating, or simple daily thankfulness. It could be better nutrition. It could be deeper breathing. It could be going out of our way to make someone’s load a bit lighter. It could be just feeding your soul or body daily.

So, I guess I wake up every morning, thankful for another day in this realm, reminding myself that my Powerhouse needs to be fed today. I feed it. It feeds me.

What a beautiful yet fragile, symbiotic relation I have with my Powerhouse. My silent warrior.